Summer Reading - Call Me Gray

Today I am very happy to share a special book with you from Kids Can Press - Call Me Gray, written by Andrew Larsen, Bells Larsen, and illustrated by Tallulah Fontaine. Before I let you know about this book, I want to ask if you know any people who were born with physical challenges due to something which happened as they grew in utero. One of my college room mates was born with a short left arm - it ended where your elbow is, and then she had a small thumb and two small fingers on a very small left "hand". Now, no one condemned my room mate for being born with a short left arm. No one attacked her with words or certainly not physically because she was born with a short left arm. Nor should they have ever done so.

I know people who have dearly loved children who were born with physical challenges - these children are of course dearly loved and accepted for the people they are regardless of what happened to them in utero - as they absolutely should be. It would be monstrous for anyone to condemn these children because of how they were born.

I grew up in conservative Baptist churches and was taught to love and accept people who are born with different challenges. But, I was also taught to condemn people who "chose" to "be someone they are not". Today in our country the Trans Community is attacked viciously - often by elected officials. But, we now know there is actually something which happens in utero which causes a person to be Trans. When a baby grows in utero, their physical sex is determined in their first two months as they grow, but their sexual differentiation of the brain starts two or three months later, in the second half of pregnancy. For most babies their physical sex matches their gender identity, but not for all. Since this happens in utero, why should we ever condemn Trans people? It is clearly not something they just "chose" - and with the hate they experience from so many others, why would anyone "choose" to be Trans if it were simply a choice? It is not, and just as it would be monstrous to condemn children who are born with a physical challenge, it is monstrous to condemn anyone who is born with a gender identity which differs from their physical sex. You are able to learn more about this at the following link. It matters for us to be people who allow science to inform us and it absolutely matters for us to be people who love and accept ALL people - it is what Jesus said, did, and told us to do. 

So, having shared this with you, today I am so happy to let you know about a wonderful new book which thoughtfully, and gently opens the door to important conversations about people who may be discovering they do not "match" their physical identity. 

Favorite Features -

• I LOVE the illustrations.
• The message of accepting and always loving comes through loud and clear.
• Encourages conversations about who we are and who others are and how to be kind, accepting, loving and to listen.

Kids Can Press says, "A child shares feelings about their identity with their dad in this powerful story about change, acceptance, and, above all, love.

One winter, while creating their annual ice rink together, a child starts a conversation with their dad about something important. ”Do you ever feel mixed up about who you are?“ the child asks. But the father misunderstands the question. So, the child tries again later. ”Do you ever feel different than the way you look?“ Again, the father doesn’t get it. But this time he asks to hear more. And the child explains. ”I look like a boy, but sometimes I feel more like a girl.“ At last, it’s been said. The child shares how their name feels like an itchy sweater and they want to change it to ”Gray.“ It’s a big change, but one they can grow into together. And when Gray’s dad finally uses their chosen name, it feels warm and right, just like hot chocolate after the first skate of the season.

This personal story, co-written by acclaimed author Andrew Larsen and his son Bells, is inspired by Bells’ own experience as a transgender person. It’s about the joy and comfort a child feels when a parent affirms their identity, and how the transition can be complex for the rest of the family. An excellent conversation starter for families with a child who might be questioning their gender identity, it centers the child’s experience of navigating and sharing what they feel, and shows, though the child’s sense of themself is changing, their place in the family is not. It also demonstrates a supportive and respectful family environment, where home is a safe space. Tallulah Fontaine’s softly focused illustrations punctuated by the red of Gray’s cap create an inviting, wintery setting."

It is my hope if you have someone you love who experiences this "difference", you will be able to continue to love and accept them. And, importantly, if you do not, you will come to understand this is about something which happened in utero, and just as with all people, should not change the way you see and/or love/accept others. 

While some people may consider Call Me Gray a book to "ban", reading it will not "make" anyone become Trans, but Call Me Gray may help those who read it become more thoughtful, more understanding, more loving.